umm, i don't know, what a shoddy list. maybe i'll write on those things, i guess i'll try expanding it some time here as well. i'm confused by certain things right now, namely the idea that people generally write things in hopes of other people reading them.. i don't think that's really what i'm trying to get out of this practice. i'd just like to keep track of some thoughts, and writing seems to help with that. again, i'm the one posting personal details on the internet (for pete's sake) of all places, but why? juuuuuust because. because other people do it? they do it more. or there's more people doing it more. lots of people. it's odd stumbling upon some random-ass site, and then discovering that there's already thousands of people already using it, and getting something out of it. how am i supposed to do anything outside of the digital world when i'm so busy updating and maintaining these few things i've joined?
clearly, not every person is intended to use every site. take for example picassa and flicker: both are web-based image hosting sites, (i guess i need to include there photobucket, imageshack and wordpress) and both are free. both allow you to store and access your photos, but they both have slight differences. is there any point in my joining both sites? various questions arise thereafter, such as: what's the damn difference? which pictures do i put where? do i even take pictures, and why would i want to bother uploading them into the cybersphere?
clearly some of these have answers, others don't. others, damn it, have multiple answers, or the answer is up for debate. or there isn't a best answer. actually this last possibility indeed seems true regardless of what i'm thinking about. anyways..
before i asked myself these questions, i wound up making both a picassa account and a flickr account..this might be a bad thing, except that i haven't even added any pictures to either(!) wait, sonabitch, it turns out picassa was purchased by google (it appears) and has been linked to my blogger account..this seems somewhat helpful, so maybe i'll keep flickr as an alternative, and just keep them independent of each other.. nice. after all, what would be the point of uploading the same pictures onto both sites? seems like a waste of bandwidth..i don't even know if that makes sense, oh well.
ok, so i've accomplished something just now. albeit something mundane and superfluous (is that possible??) but something nonetheless, and more than i can say about my life outside of this computer. haha sweet.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
wow
writing that last night felt soo good. i was able to get that venomous hatred out of my head and was able to complete sam harris's response to some sean guy at the online magazine 'discover', which was a really really interesting/comprehensive argument. it was long, but certainly worth it. today has been better, though i like doing that.
i can't write much right now, but here's a short list of some things i'd like to write longer on:
a synopsis of the specific effects marijuana has had on me as a person.
essentially the same thing regarding the abstention of sex on a person (right, that's the reason).
ok actually i can't think of anything, maybe later will work better.
i can't write much right now, but here's a short list of some things i'd like to write longer on:
a synopsis of the specific effects marijuana has had on me as a person.
essentially the same thing regarding the abstention of sex on a person (right, that's the reason).
ok actually i can't think of anything, maybe later will work better.
Monday, March 29, 2010
what the fuck
holy shit i hate clicking something and it not working, when there's no good reason for it not to work. like just now. i clicked 'new post'; nothing. for like 15 seconds, but that's aeon's on a computer. well not my computer. damn it i'm the dumbass. anyway of course i clicked it again and before i had even finished the click (it was weird) this page was loaded. it reminds me of whenever i click on something (and this is typically a problem i've experienced in the past) say an internet link and nothing happens for awhile, and then you're like 'ok, nevermind i'll just hit stop and stay on this page' and so you hit stop and what the hell happens? it stops loading the new page, and cancels out the page you had loaded, leaving you with nothing. holy shit that pisses me off. whatever.
anyway, 'what the fuck' because of that, rather than 'goddamn it' for joshua's sake. but he's the reason i'm writing:
ok, have you ever tried reading and every sentence you can't connect to the previous sentence for whatever reason, usually being high does this or if you have something on your mind? like not on your mind but right in front, directly in the forefront of your brain, usually if i get really mad i experience this and it's practically a blinding rage, and you can't think. INFURIATING. especially if you're trying to read any random ass thing or especially if it's a fucking article from some bullshit journal for a paper you don't want to write because your professor is a twat who's done nothing but sit in a fucking office the last 15 years and "TEACH" but all he's teaching is verbatim ideology bullshit that no one fucking understands. HOLY SHIT GODDAMN IT.
anyway, so joshua comes up just now and there's a topic he likes to talk about, it's the only fucking thing he talks about and i want to punch him in his fucking face when he does, and anyway he walks in and starts talking about it and i said, and i quote: "i don't care. i don't want to hear about it." and guess what the motherfucker does? HE FUCKING TELLS ME ALL ABOUT IT ANYWAYS.
this i think is the most infuriating thing i've ever experienced. do i go about telling him, or anyone else for that matter, anything? no. i keep to myself and leave well enough alone. because goddamn it i like it that way. and when the very subject matter of said dialogue (monologue i should say) relates to a topic that in itself yields unproductive and unconstructive argumentation and life choices, IT'S THE FUCKING MOST MADDENING THING I HAVE HAD TO GO THROUGH, AND IT'S A DAILY OCCURANCE.
fuck. stop.
swear.ing.
it's makes you dumb.
this is hardly helping.
i'm moving to australia.
(http://www.amazon.com/Alexander-Terrible-Horrible-Good-Very/dp/0689711735)
daily conclusion: anyone who is happy all the time is a fucking fool. no one is happy all the time, and if they are, they're living a lie. it's self induced phsycosis, and those people should be put to death.
i'm not negative or positive, i'm just sick of day to day consciousness. FUCK.
anyway, 'what the fuck' because of that, rather than 'goddamn it' for joshua's sake. but he's the reason i'm writing:
ok, have you ever tried reading and every sentence you can't connect to the previous sentence for whatever reason, usually being high does this or if you have something on your mind? like not on your mind but right in front, directly in the forefront of your brain, usually if i get really mad i experience this and it's practically a blinding rage, and you can't think. INFURIATING. especially if you're trying to read any random ass thing or especially if it's a fucking article from some bullshit journal for a paper you don't want to write because your professor is a twat who's done nothing but sit in a fucking office the last 15 years and "TEACH" but all he's teaching is verbatim ideology bullshit that no one fucking understands. HOLY SHIT GODDAMN IT.
anyway, so joshua comes up just now and there's a topic he likes to talk about, it's the only fucking thing he talks about and i want to punch him in his fucking face when he does, and anyway he walks in and starts talking about it and i said, and i quote: "i don't care. i don't want to hear about it." and guess what the motherfucker does? HE FUCKING TELLS ME ALL ABOUT IT ANYWAYS.
this i think is the most infuriating thing i've ever experienced. do i go about telling him, or anyone else for that matter, anything? no. i keep to myself and leave well enough alone. because goddamn it i like it that way. and when the very subject matter of said dialogue (monologue i should say) relates to a topic that in itself yields unproductive and unconstructive argumentation and life choices, IT'S THE FUCKING MOST MADDENING THING I HAVE HAD TO GO THROUGH, AND IT'S A DAILY OCCURANCE.
fuck. stop.
swear.ing.
it's makes you dumb.
this is hardly helping.
i'm moving to australia.
(http://www.amazon.com/Alexander-Terrible-Horrible-Good-Very/dp/0689711735)
daily conclusion: anyone who is happy all the time is a fucking fool. no one is happy all the time, and if they are, they're living a lie. it's self induced phsycosis, and those people should be put to death.
i'm not negative or positive, i'm just sick of day to day consciousness. FUCK.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
hmm
so i just spent like 30 min writing a post on my fantasy baseball message board, but i can't scrape together 15 minutes for a simple string of sentences on here? well, i am now. i mean, shit, it's sunday and i have no family (close by), no responsibilities (per se), and a sweet computer and the internet. haha, joshua asks me what i do all day; i don't think he understands the internet.
anyway, it's what 3 months since i wrote anything? lame.. idk why, maybe because the colors on this page are so god awful. just hideous (hey i kind of like them) shit well they're not bad by themselves, or even together they are (i actually do like them) but some time put into it would make it much nicer. blahhhhhhggger. lager. flogger.that's all there is.
who is my audience right?
no one.
i'm writing to myself. except that your thing is viewable to people. well 1 person.
sam if you ever read this i had no idea your pictures from google buzz were attached to words, or that you were such an avid keep-tracker-of daily information. i guess that's really the point of this site, but who wants others to read it? why didn't i ever keep a journal? forget it who cares.
just start now.
but i'm too busy being a sponge.
well squeeze yourself out every once in awhile. you can't always be shoving things into your brain, sometimes it's therapeutic to wring something out from time to time.. with your own twist of course.
hmm, thats. not. a. bad. way. of putting it.
thanks.
no thank you.
(do all people converse with themselves mentally? surely. thus, scizcsophrenia is a bogus condition. schizophrenia isn't though. hey i type phrenetically. you mean frenetically. yes and no. ha!)
oh snap lvb for the finale..
a man sat in a tree twiddling his thumbs.
a bird flew by and stopped, sat, and stared.
what's the matter bird he said, haven't you seen a man do nothing before?
the bird cawed once, twice, then flew up into a gust, and coasted on the breeze..
the difference between man and bird? birds don't have thumbs.
that was stupid. whatever. who cares?
anyway, it's what 3 months since i wrote anything? lame.. idk why, maybe because the colors on this page are so god awful. just hideous (hey i kind of like them) shit well they're not bad by themselves, or even together they are (i actually do like them) but some time put into it would make it much nicer. blahhhhhhggger. lager. flogger.that's all there is.
who is my audience right?
no one.
i'm writing to myself. except that your thing is viewable to people. well 1 person.
sam if you ever read this i had no idea your pictures from google buzz were attached to words, or that you were such an avid keep-tracker-of daily information. i guess that's really the point of this site, but who wants others to read it? why didn't i ever keep a journal? forget it who cares.
just start now.
but i'm too busy being a sponge.
well squeeze yourself out every once in awhile. you can't always be shoving things into your brain, sometimes it's therapeutic to wring something out from time to time.. with your own twist of course.
hmm, thats. not. a. bad. way. of putting it.
thanks.
no thank you.
(do all people converse with themselves mentally? surely. thus, scizcsophrenia is a bogus condition. schizophrenia isn't though. hey i type phrenetically. you mean frenetically. yes and no. ha!)
oh snap lvb for the finale..
a man sat in a tree twiddling his thumbs.
a bird flew by and stopped, sat, and stared.
what's the matter bird he said, haven't you seen a man do nothing before?
the bird cawed once, twice, then flew up into a gust, and coasted on the breeze..
the difference between man and bird? birds don't have thumbs.
that was stupid. whatever. who cares?
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